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monika894
20 June 2011 @ 11:28 pm
I most definitely want to know what happens after death. There are so many different opinions and I really want to know what's it all really like.

Actually I've wanted to know what happens after death since I was a kid. I remember promising to myself that once I'm dying I won't be afraid of it and desperately try to keep on living. Instead I'd keep my curiosity and just wait and see what happens. I think I was about 4 or 5 at the time I made up my mind about that.

I've even kind of wanted to die. Not at all because life was bad and I was tired of living but just because I was, and still am, so very curious of what will actually happen.

So yes, I want to know what happens after I die, but I don't necessarily want to know now. I'll just wait and see
 
 
Current Location: home
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: KAT-TUN - Yuuki no Hana
 
 
monika894
06 January 2011 @ 02:51 am
Rain  
i found this while going trough the random shit i've saved on my computer and since i really do love rain sometimes, and i promised to start using this journal more, i thought that 'oh well, might as well post it' XD

i really love walking in the rain. alone. with no umbrella, raincoat or whatever else. just walk on the nearly empty streets, under the dark gray cloudy sky and feel the rain drenching all your clothes, running down your face and soaking you hair. you hear the raindrops hit the ground everywhere around you. it's a little chilly, but not really cold. you don't even listen to music. sure one of the reasons is that getting your ipod wet wouldn't be too great, but mostly it's just because the sound of rain and wind and everything is enough. you feel no need to add music. you don't see many other people and the few that do pass you by are all carrying umbrellas, shielding themselves from the rain and hurrying to get home already. most of them probably won't even notice you. they're too busy escaping the water pouring from the sky, too deep in their own thoughts. they probably won't even look up from the ground. and the ones who do notice you will mostly just give you weird looks. 'why the hell isn't she even trying to shield herself from the rain?' maybe even kind of pitying 'poor thing, she's so wet, must be really cold. she'll probably get sick now' they don't understand how nice it feels to just walk there like that, let everything go and listen to the rain falling, watch as puddles form and just get bigger and bigger. as the time goes by you see the sky clearing and the raindrops getting smaller and not so frequent. sometimes it stops like that, other times it only clears for a while, just to start again with more power. as the day's coming to an end you feel the weather get colder, sky just goes darker. and then when it really ends you feel the freshness that the city always has after the rain. everything just feels so clean and new. and then there's this amazing scent that's always there after everything has been washed so clean, the dust is gone from the streets and grass and trees are so much greener again. and when you've finally had enough of it all, you go home, change into warm, dry clothes and make yourself something nice and hot to drink. if it's still raining, then nows' the perfect time to just sit in a comfy armchair, in the warmth of your house. and listen to the rain outside, enjoy the rattling on your roof and raindrops running down your window.

for a little while you can just forget everything and enjoy it all.

 

 
 
monika894
22 November 2010 @ 01:24 am
How do you feel when a favorite band breaks up? Do you still follow the original band members in their new projects?


in the beginning i will and then decide if i like what they do now or not. if i don't really like their individual work then i'll probably just check once in a while for what they've done, but won't really follow anymore.
 
 
Current Mood: busybusy
 
 
monika894
09 September 2010 @ 09:07 pm
Hello, 
So finally my first post!
I don't know how often i'll update this journal but i tought it would be nice to at least post something. What should i write anyway?
 I don't even know if anyone will read it cause i haven't told anyone i know that i have this journal.:) Just made it to participate in a KT fan project, but i don't like journals whit no entries at all so i'll just write something.
Anyway summer's over. I've gone to school for a week now but feels like at least a month. But at the same time it feels like the week's gone by so fast. :D
A lot of new students in my class, only about 1/3 are the same as last year. But the people are pretty cool so it's fine.
This saturday my japanese classes will start again, really excited for that. Haven't seen any of the people from there the whole summer. And the teacher too, he's awesome.
So what else. I'm going to Venice soon. Should tell my class teacher but i'm sure she won't like it. Going away from school for a week when the school just started 2 weeks ago. Yeah, she'll be angry. But too late to change it now, i've got the plane tickets. Not like i'd choose a week of going to school over a week in Venice anyway.

I guess that's it for now.
 
 
Current Location: my room
Current Mood: satisfiedsatisfied
Current Music: David Guetta-If we ever were